The GOP "Elephant in the Room"

*Editor's note: I wrote this a llloooonnnngggg time ago. Way before the GOP primaries, so I'm not jumping aboard any bandwagon like a silly-nanny. Also, my failed attempts at humor should not be laughed at unless it's a courtesy laugh to bolster my ego.

There are really only two things that I talk about on this blog: religion and politics. So, I know you guys must be DYING to know my feelings about Mitt Romney and the whole "controversy" about whether or not he's electable because of his Mormonism. A topic I've been sort of quiet about, but you can be sure that I have an opinion. I'm quiet about it for good reason, I think. So, for all of you die-hard readers out there (hi, Mom!) I am interrupting the silence with my stinky brain farts of wisdom.

I am going to get right to the point and tell you the official Hardy GOP candidate endorsement (and we all know how much weight that holds). Remember long ago, when I said that I was hopeful for Herman Cain? Wow, that's funny! Anyway, what was I saying about just getting to the point? Oh yeah -- I give my official Hardy endorsement to Mitt Romney. I said it. I want the guy to win. Some of you are surprised. Some of you aren't. Some of you have indigestion. Some of you wonder how you ended up here. And one of you is wondering who the other "some" are that I'm referring to. Sorry, Mom, I don't know.

Here's why I've been quiet about it. Well, firstly, I hadn't really made my mind up until about a month ago. Secondly, I don't want anyone to even believe for a split second that I'm just giving my vote blindly to him because we are both Mormons. Not so. Harry Reid is a Mormon, and I desperately want him out of the senate seat of a state that I don't live in nor intend to live in. And I could give you a list a mile long of Mormons that I would not want to become president (starting with some of my very, very good friends, bless 'em).

Fourth, er, thirdly, I really don't think that Romney is the ideal candidate except in today's political climate. Meaning, he doesn't fly, doesn't save school buses from falling off cliffs, doesn't save kittens from burning buildings, but he does have fantastic hair. And furthermost, the man is a financial and echo-nomic genius, and THAT is what we need right now. We need a kick in the pants of the economy, instead of teases of economic stimulation that just leave the country feeling rather randy. And he's the best one to do it. And honestly, will there ever be the ideal candidate? I think not. But, I guess what I should have said is that he is the ideal candidate right now, because let's be honest, the changing political landscape calls for different types of leadership at different times. Have I lost you yet? Because I feel as lost as Obama without a teleprompter.

As far as Mitt's Mormon religion, and those nay-sayers who . . . say "nay," all I have to say is: (ahem) PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!! Remember when there was bedlam in the streets about JFK, and all those nayers who said that if he, a Catholic, ever got into office, kiss the country goodbye and prepare to be led by the Pope! Well, I don't remember that, because I wasn't born yet, but I read about it (history!). Soooo, why isn't more interest being placed on Obummer's religion (or lack of)? And why does religion matter in voting for a president? I think God cares as much about who the president is as much as He cares about if the Broncos win the superbowl.

Actually, I'm being facetious--I really do think God cares about who is leading the country that, as taught by the LDS church, is a promised land gifted to us that we are very fortunate to live in. Yes, I think God cares that a good person should run the country that allows religious freedom, but I also think that good people exist everywhere and personal relationships with God is not something saved for Mormons alone. I would have no problem at all voting for a man or woman of a different faith, so long as that person has some amount of moral fiber. If you are Mormon, Catholic, Presbyterian, Methodist, non-denominational, GOOD-GOLLY, IF YOU'RE AN HONEST, MORAL, UPSTANDING PERSON THEN I WANT YOU TO LEAD! And if you think that Romney is going to force everyone into practicing Mormonism, then you are in essence calling Romney an apostate Mormon (which would actually grab the evangelical vote, right?), because he would be in direct violation of core values and beliefs of the LDS community:

We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may. (Articles of Faith, #11)

I'm really trying to take the high road and not make myself an example of exactly the kind of person that bothers me . . . BUT, the main groups that are saying Romney is a cult member and must be avoided at all costs, and are saying that they will never ever vote for him are Southern Baptists and Born Again Christians. And while LDS members go door-to-door and talk to strangers like crazy people, I have never met people more forceful about their religion than Southern Baptists and Born Again Christians. And for being such vocal advocates for "the real Jesus," they sure are mean and unpleasant.

So, if you're against having a Mormon president at all cost, then fine. Just remember that the cost is possibly more of Obama. And curious, how do you feel about Obama's religion? I guess the real question is, can you identify which religion he belongs to, and does that matter to you? And if this rant doesn't apply to you (ie, religion doesn't play a role in who you vote for), then ask if you'd rather re-elect a man who has shown a complete lack of financial comprehension, or bring in someone who has proven that they can manage big budgets. Essentially, we have bigger fish to fry. Religion should be the biggest non-issue of this election.

And since I think it should be a non-issue, let me continue to beat this dead horse. Mormons try to be like Christ, and even if you think we're misguided, is it so bad that we're trying? Even if you don't believe in Christ, is that a bad standard to hold ourselves to? We are extremely family-oriented. We are honest, and hard working. Would it be so bad to have someone like that as the president? You can keep masking your deep-seated hatred and negativity towards Mormonism behind the title "true Christianity." And if Romney did take orders from the prophet, then BE CAREFUL! He's taking advice from this man! And if you don't believe in Christ or God, why would you worry about us trying to act more like the Christ we believe in? And it might be horrible for a Mormon president to act on the principle taught by this prophet.

I didn't really want to delve too much into the religious aspect of it. I just wanted to point out that it's ridiculous. It's just as ridiculous as being called racist for not supporting Obama. But, at the same time, just as people voted for Obama simply because he is black, I don't want anyone thinking that I'm voting for Romney just because he's Mormon. People are making connections that just aren't there. My, how the tables have turned.

Hyrum Smith, brother to LDS prophet Joseph Smith and early Church leader said, "We want a President of the United States, not a party President, but a President of the whole people . . . and . . . have a President who will maintain every man in his rights." Rights, including the right to worship in your own way or not at all.

And WOW: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehD390q9G3k - from 1965

And, if I was funny, clever, and smart I would've written this article instead of the one you just read.

I have to admit that this blog post is a lie -- my mom doesn't read this.